It's just a bunch of crap

I know you really don't want to talk about this...but...

I FINALLY POOPED!!!

Hallelujah! 

Praise the Lord!

I have never been so relieved!!  (Pun intended)

I was worried about being stopped up,  but boy oh boy,  I never thought it would be that bad. 

I took mirolax,  drank kombucha,  and enjoyed my regular dose of coffee and four days after surgery, at 4:30AM on Friday I finally claimed my victory.  I never would have thought the actual act of pooping would hurt so bad - especially since my chest was recently ripped open and all. 

My advice to you -  they say "stay ahead of the pain" and that's important,  but stay ahead of your poop!  Roughage,  load up on stool softeners,  take probiotics,  call Jamie Lee Curtis and ask her about poop yogurt, and drink kombucha.  Also, if you are as lucky as I am to have a dear friend who gives you the gift of medicated cottonelle wipes - keep both the friend and the wipes,  they will come in handy.

Also,  another personal victory - Tim and I have made it through another medical trauma without having a husband/wife butt wiping situation.  There are just some mysteries that I would like to remain unsolved.